Is Repairing Your Marriage After Rehab Possible?

Few things take a greater toll on relationships than addiction. If you are an addict in recovery and you are married, you may be wondering what will happen next. Is your spouse going to leave you? Will she ever trust you again? How will you ever make it up to her? Divorce in the aftermath of addiction is not uncommon, but it is possible to repair your marriage. You can make it up to your wife if you are both willing to do the work. The fact that you sought recovery is a sign that you can work toward repairing all aspects of your life damaged by addiction.

Is Divorce Inevitable After Addiction?

Divorce may be common when one partner is addicted, but it does not need to be inevitable. Addiction is one of the biggest challenges your relationship will ever face, but you can bring it back from the brink. To do so, you both need to be on the same page. Have an honest and open discussion with your wife and find out if she is committed to working with you to repair your relationship. She may have doubts, but hopefully the fact that you were willing to ask for professional help will convince her that you are serious about making amends.

How Do You Make Amends To Your Spouse?

Making amends is an important part of the recovery process and no one deserves it more than your partner. Addiction leads people to do hurtful things to the ones they love the most. You may have lied to her, cheated on her or neglected her. You have a lot of making up to do, and although it may seem daunting, it is possible.

Making up for all the hurt and damage does not mean that you have to spend the rest of your life groveling and giving in to your spouse. If that is what she is expecting, you are both headed down the wrong path. Making amends means apologizing and restoring her faith in you. To do so you need to treat her well, make heartfelt apologies and, most importantly, strive to avoid relapsing and sinking back into the hole of addiction.

Can Your Spouse Ever Trust You Again?

One of the biggest impediments to bringing back a healthy relationship is trust. What you damaged the most in your marriage was your wife’s trust. You probably promised over and over again to stop using, to stop lying, to stop cheating, and to be better. These were all promises you were incapable of keeping at the time, but they did damage to trust nonetheless.

The only way to develop trust is to earn it. Unfortunately, earning trust takes much more time than losing it. It takes many repeated instances of being reliable and dependable to earn trust. Make sure your wife understands that her trust will be slow to regain. Keep being the person she needs you to be, and with time, she will trust you again.

Repairing a marriage after the devastation caused by addiction is a difficult challenge, but not an impossible one. Be sure to communicate with each other about what you are feeling; rekindle your love for each other by spending quality time together and consider seeking the help of a professional marriage counselor. Perhaps most importantly, continue to work on your own recovery. The best way to show your spouse that you are committed to rebuilding your relationship is to stay sober and avoid relapse.

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